Dream Fragment: Finding Deeper Commitment

Dream Fragment: Finding Deeper Commitment

It is early morning. I’m walking down a city street with several young college students. Speaking to the nearest student, I tell him that he ought to re-read everything that he has read from Gurdjieff. “You are in a different state of being now. Your understanding of Gurdjieff will be more complete if you return to his work.”

As we continue to walk, I speak to all of the students. “Gurdjieff is no ordinary man. At one point, he was out of the country for four years. Upon returning, he stayed up for four days straight visiting friends and relatives. He remained at the fourth level of consciousness all this time. You know, he can make himself disappear in a room full of people. He will still be there psychically but you won’t be able to see him while other people might. He can cloud a man’s eyes,” I tell the boys and then go into a discussion on Gurdjieff’s insistence on super effort.

The young college boys are ‘I’s in myself that have studied the writing’s of Gurdjieff. The ‘I’ that I take as myself, Jack, is trying to convince these other ‘I’s in himself that they need to reread Gurdjieff’s work. The dream is telling Jack that he has reached a higher state in himself and would benefit from reading the Gurdjieff work again.

It is several days later. I am with some kind of resistance group in World War Two Germany. There are only a half dozen or so of us. We are walking with our weapons in full sight of the German soldiers. There is no shooting between us, and the enemy soldiers do not try to stop us. I pass one soldier who I recognize as a classmate from high school. He points his gun at me and makes some taunting remarks. “If you don’t stop, I’ll shot you,” I tell him. He continues to taunt me. I pull the trigger of my rifle, but nothing happens.

An hour or so goes by. I pass the same solider again. He begins to mock me. I pull the trigger, but the gun doesn’t shot. The boy makes an adjustment to my weapon and tells me that it will work now.

It is time for lunch. I follow other members of our group down into a prison cell where we will have sandwiches. A girl who is the leader of our group discovers that one of the prisoners has just been operated on. The operation is not complete. She goes off to make the final touches on the operation even though she knows that the jailer will be up set with her for doing so. I sit down on a bunk with my rifle in hand. There is message for me from some one who use to hang at the Trivia Coffee House. It says that I should begin studying computers.

The scene shifts to the United States in 1993. We are the same group of war resisters. Now, we are protesting U.S. involvement in military actions in South America. I am listening to a short wave radio trying to hear the news from the front lines. We feel that U.S. government is making threatening gestures that may get us involved in war.

My enlistment is ended. I am shaking hands and hugging people. I tell them that I wish that I had been more involved and that I will be back in a few years. Before I finish making the rounds, I discover that I have been called up to serve in the army. Though I am opposed to war, I have decided to report for duty and take it from there. Everyone wishes me well as I take my leave. One of the leaders of our group escorts me to the bus and tells me that he that he is riding in my direction. The bus riders are treating me like a hero because I have been called to serve. Several give me hands full of silver as they exit the bus.

Then I remember that my car and all of my clothes are at a motel near where the bus makes a left hand turn. I tell the driver that I need to get off the bus right here. When I get off the bus, I recall that my car, a 1960 black and white Buick has been wrecked. One whole side has been bashed in, but I think that it is still drivable.

I find that I have exited the bus at 30^th and Broadway. The motel is on 44^th and Broadway. I see several cabs going in that direction. The first one is loaded with cardboard boxes. I tell the driver that I use to work with him and he makes room for me in the cab. At the motel I see that my car is parked in a fence off yard. The motel owner tells me that I will have to pay storage and a towing fee. I am wondering if he will give me a break when he learns that I have just been drafted. I am also wondering if the car will make it across country. I am afraid that parts will fall off.

The dream begins with the dreamer, Jack, patrolling with a resistance group in World War Two Germany. No one is shooting at anyone, and the enemy solider who fixes Jack’s weapon is an old high school friend. The whole scene of war and soldiers comes from the unconscious memory of war games that Jack played as a child. Through he now thinks of himself as a pacifist, he is still influenced by the attitudes to war that he learned as a child when the United States and Germany were at war with each other.

When the scene shifts back to the present Jack finds himself with the same group. But, now instead of resistance fighters, the group is protesting their country’s possible involvement in a war with South America. Just like when they were in Germany the group is playing at protesting rather than actually doing something more positive. When Jack’s time is up with the play group, he discovers that he has been drafted. Through he thinks of himself as a pacifist, Jack decides to show up for duty. Again the dream asks Jack how serious is his commitment.

When he leaves the group and heads back across the country, Jack is more worried about money problems and transportation. Again the dream shows Jack that his commitments are not very deep.

Like the first dream fragment, this dream is telling Jack that he has to reassess his knowledge and commitment to discover the deeper meaning in his life.